I am in the process of preparing to sell my house and simultaneously looking for another one. I have a Realtor, but being the proactive (impatient) person that I am, I decided to do an online hunt. I found the perfect home. It had a white picket fence; wall-to-wall hardwood floors; and--be still my heart--two built-in curio cabinets! It sat on an acre of land with a small creek on the back of the property. And of all things, it was right in my price range.
I promptly sent the listing to my Realtor and we made plans to go house hunting that coming Saturday. Already I had decided on how I was going to decorate my new home. I'd picked out the perfect dining room suite to match the built-ins; I'd envisioned the Christmas party I was going to have this year. Oh, everything was perfect and going along to my plan. That is until the night before. I got a call from my realtor's friend who said my Realtor was in the emergency room with an extremely bad case of kidney stones! I could not believe it! I am so embarrassed to admit this, but as much as I felt badly for her, I was pretty ticked that I wouldn't be able to see my new home. Even more so I was a little ticked that God had thrown yet another monkey wrench into my plans. And I made sure I told him how I felt about it.
"God, why do you always tell me 'No' to everything I want?" I whined. I brought up all the things that I felt God had dealt me a raw deal: not getting the jobs I've wanted, not sending me the husband I wanted, and a whole list of other little rants. Curiously, God said nothing.
I decided that I was still going to look at my new home. I decided that I was going to call the listing agent, explain the situation, and ask him if he'd show it to me (I justified this because both Realtors work for the same agency). Early the next morning, my phone rang. It was my Realtor apologizing for having to reschedule our appointment. After assuring her that it was no problem, her statement gave me pause.
"I wanted to tell you about one of the listings you sent me--you know, the one with the picket fence? It floods. About 10 years ago when I first became an agent, I sold that house to an extended family member, but nobody disclosed that the creek behind it floods. Not only that, but the it's had some poorly constructed additions."
Talk about humbling. I immediately repented. Then God spoke, and brought to my mind
For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless. NIV
God does not withhold anything good from us, and conversely he does withhold bad things from us. I thought about my tirade from the night before. All of the things God said 'no' to were for my good. Verse 12 of the same chapter says:
O LORD Almighty,
blessed is the man who trusts in you.
I guess what I've learned from this whole experience is that I don't trust God that he's got my best interests at heart. My prayer and my desire is that I will trust God and seek him with my whole heart, and know that he loves so much that he won't allow me to make a mistake in buying a house that floods, or marrying the wrong man, or working a job that would be the wrong fit for me. How awesome is that?